Monday, March 19, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act XI: The Bombing of Bush's Baghdaddy of a Blitzkrieg Edition

All that I can say after four years of widening Middle East carnage and misery is that I'm one-hundred percent shocked and awed by our president's ability for stability in Baghdad and beyond. Thank you, Mr. President Bush. And thanks for your honesty in all matters with and before the American people.

Anyone for "4 More Years!"? How about: "Kiss my ex-Republican ass, Georgie, you smarmy SOB sack-o-shit!"

Strong language and action to follow.



Lights. Ballast. Action! Welcome to another edition of Cirque de Critique.

Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. Become a ringmaster! Contact The Hippo right here and ask.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes or rings, if you will: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All.

For-All-Free


Briefly emerging from her closet of shyness is TherapyDoc who presents Popularity posted at Everyone needs therapy? Lessons from a family therapist, saying, "What do I do about this burning desire to ignore the person on my right, or worse yet, roast the one to my left? Why or why did my parents do this to me, make me feel guilty for NOT being nice. What were they thinking?"

Dear TherapyDoc: Will I start harboring latent pangs of guilt over now not being popular with President Bush? Please help.



Due to future out-of-control spirals of oil prices, Cir de Cri's 'All-for-Free' category has been substituted by just plain nothingness for this edition.

Free-for-All


Speaking of closeted and coming out, and proving that Ann Coulter has become the new C-PAC Shakur, Cir de Cri fans will go away from our next entry getting a good grasp of 'gay grammar' when Zimzo gives a heads up so you can C-PAC your ass off in Resolved: It's ok to call John Edwards a faggot posted at novatownhall blog, saying, "As interesting for the comments as the post itself (if not moreso)."

Okay, I get the whole C-PAC/Coulter argument that 'faggot' is just some sort of playground rhetorical device. In that case, blow it out your hole you bunch of C-pocked faggots!

So much for statesmanship.



Folks, that's all. And thanks to all for participating.

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Monday, March 05, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act X: The 'Troupe of Two' Edition

Can a troupe of two overtake an army of one? It's possible by looking at the state of affairs our toady, star-peduncled military brass have left to those interned.

The American people are now held hostage by the costs associated with the military's expeditions and the shoddy mop-up operations by our so-called private contractors. Add this in with the GAO's siren warning of future economic hardship for most because of shoddy actuarial assumptions and spines resting on backs of velvet congressional thrones, and we will all soon be needing to serve in the National Guard for at least seventy-six quarters and doing so actively at attainment of age eighty-two in order to qualify, not for monthly Social Security retirement benefits, but the shoddy two-hundred-odd dollar death payout.

Lights. Ballast. Action! Welcome to another edition of Cirque de Critique.

Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. Become a ringmaster! Contact The Hippo right here and ask.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes or rings, if you will: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All. Our troupe of two has forgot about anything being all-for-free.

For-All-Free



Avant News presents California Scientists Map God Genome posted at Avant News.

God Genome Update! Basic research proves vital once again when same scientists discover that ninety percent of God's genes are redundantly similar to Drosophila!

Free-for-All


Both Will Chen and Jessica Okon have chosen to present to Cir de Cri fans At What Price? Bounty From the Belly of the Big Box Beast posted at Wisebread.

Maybe Cir de Cri's ringmaster can also serve as ringbearer at Will and Jessica's upcoming matrimonial.



Folks, that's all. And thanks to all for your participation.

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Sunday, February 18, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act IX: A Presidents Day Pile-up

Americans are making this Presidents Day a real gas. Pennsylvania's pikes were left a parking lot after snowy smash-ups. Per course, the Daytona 500 Auto Jam ends up in another, with an unusual fiery flip-side for one lucky racer who was left to finish not right-side-up. Then there's the pile-up of aircraft carrier groups in the Persian Gulf for security purposes -- oil's and gas', that is.

Lights. Ballast. Action! Welcome to another edition of Cirque de Critique.

Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. Become a ringmaster! Contact The Hippo right here and ask.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes or rings, if you will: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All.

All-for-Free


Aching for a big American, corporately low-densitized lipoid burger is Britain's own Bill Chapman. Mr. Chapman likes 'em fatty and fast at Leopards and Spots and Cardiothoracic Surgery posted at Tales of the Masked Avenger.

With all of that lard clogging things up, Mr. Chapman's salad days may soon be over.



LolaLondon presents 12. A Rose by Any Other Name posted at L'undone, saying, "Here is a tale of high-weirdness, big love, cyber-crime and the mutual insane obsession of two people that never even met. This blog is the true story of how it happened."

Chapter 13: Thorny Situation Occurs When Meeting Never Happens, Again!

Free-for-All


In true, vaunted, free-for-all fashion, we find that feminist Texan panties are getting "all in a twist" about mandated government intrusion so massively profitable pharmaceutical giants can become more so when Jamila Akil presents Texas Gov. Perry Issues Executive Order Forcing 6th Grade Girls To Receive HPV Vaccinations posted at Jamila Akil, saying, "The opinion of one feminist who disagrees with many other feminists about mandating vaccination with Gardasil."



Folks, that's all and thanks to all.


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Sunday, February 04, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act. VIII: Super Battleship Bowl Edition

George Bush's leading the three-ringed, bracket-buster Battleship tournament happening early in this edition of Cirque de Critique and in the Persian Gulf! A strategic error concerning placement of his PT boat behind the cruiser in the second round might spell disaster for not only the good Bush name, but for those named American.

Lights. Ballast. Action!

Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. Become a ringmaster! Contact The Hippo right here and ask.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes and/or rings: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All. This edition's focus is on the free-for-all and a bit on the family.

Free-for-All


Because Bush's blab schooling didn't turn out as did Old Abe's, Avant News reports that the 110th Congress Passes No President Left Behind Act posted at Avant News. Thanks for the update, Ion.



Cir de Cri's house counselor, Linda Freedman, reminds us not to get caught in a paradoxic box since that could lead to hazards to one's mental health -- at least from the inside, not out at The Paradox posted at Everyone needs therapy? Lessons from a family therapist, saying, "For some people, a good therapeutic paradox zips over their heads. They miss the intervention and don't make any changes. (Imagine that.) Others, however, see the sublime simplicity and irresistibly, succombe."



Standing in for our fat, singing lady to end this edition as a kind of oleo out-caller, Craig Harper presents Politically Correct Crap. posted at Renovate your life with Craig, saying, "Recently I was giving one of my motivational talks and I used the expression, 'fat bloke'.

Following the presentation a woman approached me to let me know that I had offended her with my 'language'. When she told me that 'fat' was the offensive word, I nearly fell down.

I said: "1. he was a bloke and 2. he was fat....what's offensive?"

Then she really hated me."

Mr. Harper adds that "I'm sick of people creating new labels for fat in order to make us feel better ...." Okay, then how about 'Glycerated Guy'. Maybe 'Lipidal Lad' or just 'Lipidnic' for short. Sorry, I'm just trying to move the discussion floorward.



Folks, that's all. Go Bears.

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Monday, January 22, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act VII: Pre-POTUS/SOTU Headache Edition

While George Bush attempts to steal home, mind you from first, by vainly appealing to his dwindled base during his SOTU address, so too should you realize he's caught in a rundown and will be out soon. Huzzah.

And huzzah to: Lights. Ballast. Action!

Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. To be a ringmaster, contact The Hippo right here and ask to do so.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes and/or rings: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All.

All-for-Free


Some say a pinch of fiscal restraint in one's earlier years goes a long way later on -- just ask of Einstein's opinion of compounding interest. But Andrea Dickson thinks otherwise in Bourgeoisie Guilt: Can I Conquer My Vanity for the Sake of My Sanity? posted at Wise Bread. This story also gives testimony to the ancient maxim of opposites attracting, if for only the sake of the ability to stay within the current bourgeoiety.



Non-confrontist/perfectionist that I am, going overbread with the lox may be a bit too much before Happy Hour. But not so with Linda Freedman in That Bagel and Cream Cheese at Everyone needs therapy? Lessons from a family therapist, saying, "People who just have to tell you what to do, who have to criticize to the point of showing you what you're doing wrong when you make the sandwich of your dreams, simply have to be confronted. But in a nice way, an irrefutable way. TherapyDoc presents her version of confronting the criticizer."



Will Chen presents Bourgeoisie Guilt: Can I Conquer My Vanity for the Sake of My Sanity? posted at Wisebread, saying, "Andrea examines why she feels compelled to spend more than she can afford."

Who's Will Chen?

Free-for-All


On science watch, Avant News pre-alerts the readership that Einstein's opinion on compounding interest may not be so swell now that God Loses Dice, as ever priesciently posted at Avant News.



I guess the pachyderms didn't want three rings after all along with them being for-all-free since they took out one in a rampage and have since been corraled as humanly possible. Hopefully by Act VIII all will be re-erected. Thanks for your patronage. Watch your step on the way out.


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Sunday, January 07, 2007

 

Cirque de Critique, Act VI: The Issue of Hangovers

The seasonal nog wore hard on the ringmaster -- so hard that he has been given temporary pachyderm poop-scoop duty just to clear his head! Old, smelly salts need not apply!

Lights. Ballast. Action! Cir de Cri's the big blog carnival tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to submit your critical posts in a future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. To be a ringmaster, contact The Hippo right here and ask to do so.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes and/or rings: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All.

All-for-Free

Seeing that this edition is short of entrants due to liberties taken with the nog, Abe Linkum's going to throw one in that illustrates a futuristic look at embryonic stem cell research gone asunder in: Failure of Embryonic Stem Cell Research Leads to New Hope for America's Public School Kids. Enjoy!

Free-for-All

Our next entrant certainly isn't looking for The Anarchist's Cookbook at his local library and, apparently, has concluded that man isn't capable as a self-regulating mechanism since Corey presents The Problem With Anarchy (Short Version) posted at myopiniononeverything.com.

Corey must be from the 'new school'. He presents evidence that, nowadays, all school campuses have a class of anarchic artistes that draw "the anarchy symbol"? Not in my day, Corey. I don't even know what that symbol looks like. Is it a scatter plot? As far as our high school's band was concerned, our symbol for anarchy was an E# key signature. And, the only other thing symbolic of anarchy at our school was the students' general behavior.

...and the curtain falls on another act of Cir de Cri. Thanks to all for participating.

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Saturday, December 23, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique: Act V, Pirates of Christmas

Ho! Ho! Ho! ...and a bottle o' rum; and nog. Pirate Al the Kiddies Pal is takin' over this act as Cir de Cri's ringmaster in a stab at hijacking all of Grinch's holiday laurels.

Lights. Ballast. Action! Cir de Cri's the big tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them! If you'd like to submit your critical posts in future edition, please do so right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cirque's looking for future hosts, too. To be a ringmaster, contact The Hippo right here and ask to do so.

Each act of Cir de Cri has three scenes: All-for-Free, For-All-Free, and the vaunted Free-for-All.

All-for-Free

Since we fired our talent scout last week, production needed to fill this scene, so Abe Linkum presents Abusing Churchill, where Abe lets Hugh Hewitt know that invaders and occupiers can't be appeasers.

For-All-Free

Public house diplomacy doesn't look to be enough to save the River Ribble. The debate over the river's future is heating up, especially concerning a particular "consultation" by developers which concluded that Ribble dwellers should be dammed and shut up. And, and that a huge housing development in the Ribble's floodplain will ultimately proceed, with drainage running rampantly to flood out areas not previously considered by the 'consultants'.

Follow all the action as headwaters dry out and waters corrupt as
Riversider presents Riversway Riverworks Consultation - Ignoring the Questions That Most Concern Residents posted at Save The Ribble!.

Free-for-All

True to Cir de Cri's vaunted free-for-all category, Hakim Abdullah mixes it up with right-winged idealogues at Notes & Dialogue on Family and Liberty posted at Wa Salaam. It's here that Mr. Abdullah makes a poignant observation that social exclusivity, in high fashion among right-wingers as evidenced by the cocoonish home-schooling trend (mine), creeps toward a tendency to distort the meaning of 'liberty' and 'justice', bastardizing these words to "recklessness" and "revenge", respectively.

As the lights dim on another act of Cir de Cri, we thank all who have participated. See everyone next time.

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Sunday, December 10, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique: Act IV

... and throw that Iraq Study Report in with the other wads for The Human Ballistic Cannon Ball shot! Stat! Lights, ballast, action!

Laden and gentry, Act IV of Cir de Cri starts now!

Cir de Cri is the big tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. We're looking for ringmasters to host future editions, so contact The Hippo right here to run the circus. And more importantly, submit your critical posts to Cir de Cri on the icon right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cir de Cri has three categories for your submissions: All-for-Free, For-All-Free and the vaunted Free-for-All!

All-for-Free

Taking the 'Doge-matic', amoral approach in an attempt to solve the Iraq disaster is Obadiah Shoher who sends Danny Simkin to present to Cir de Cri fans: Samson Blinded - A Machiavellian Perspective on the Middle East Conflict. Ending the civil war creates the Shiite axis posted at Samson Blinded.

Mr. Shoher asks those looking to be shorn of any bit of humanity left in them: "Who cares" about "4,000" Iraqis "killed" last November? (Being a man of numbers, I'll lowball Shoher's minimalist corporal mien up to around 12,205 -- give or take eleven-hundred.) He also claims that "the slaughter is not the US's business" and Iraq must be "punished accordingly", past, present and future, for not making more of it for "US".

Shoher's floury view of the "current situation" in Iraq takes florid form when he sees "benefits" arising from civil war since more "lives and money" would be lost and violence could reach a higher "Muslim standard", with Baghdad becoming 'a bane magnet'.

In leaving, Shoher gives the reader a funny aside about some US soldier not worth it -- whatever "it" means. I think I'll poke out Shoher's other two eyeballs. Nyuck! Nyuck!

(P.S. -- Don't miss Samson's sidebar featuring a blog called The Republican Attack Squad where the authors wear silly masks to hide in and their mission statement is: 'The reason "they" hate us.' I am not making this up! These cats get consigned to Cirque's Freak Show.)

For-All-Free

As always fitting, in our center ring is Ion Zwitter, Managing Editor of Avant News, presenting 3rd Iraq Study Group Report Calls for Iterative –Izations posted at Avant News. Here, Mr. Zwitter demonstrates the recurrent loopiness that happens when today's statesmen sit down to document their next path to permatize war's permutations so they can continue its, and their, relevancy for decades to come.

I can't wait.

Free-for-All

In Cirque's vaunted Free-for-All, Dr Kavokin presents Insurance Expert Discusses Health Care Crisis. Sort of. posted at RDoctor Medical Portal.

I sort of wonder if I need health insurance to cover the Russian eye-chart exam since Dr. Kavokin writes: "I’ve long maintained that employer-based health insurance is, in a word, stupid. There’s only one overarching benefit to group insurance at this time: guaranteed issue of coverage (coupled with portability)(so I guess that’s two benefits, sorry)."

Don't be sorry, be happy! There used to be portable guaranteed life insurance in some pension plans, too. So, does financial health equate with the physical? And, is there still future opportunities in corner apple stands?

As our curtain drops quickly, thanks to all for your participation.


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Sunday, November 26, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique: Act III

Lights, ballast, action! Act III of Cir. de Cri. starts now!

Cir. de Cri. is the big tent that takes all as long as those taken take on others trying to take them. If you'd like to host a future edition, contact The Hippo right here. You can also submit your critical posts to Cir. de Cri. on the icon right below:

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Cir. de Cri. has three categories for your submissions: All-for-Free, For-All-Free and the vaunted Free-for-All!

All-for-Free

Ion Zwitter, Managing Editor of Avant News, certainly isn't all wet in reporting that Bush's doctrine of 'shock and awe' applied to the recent mid-term elections as well as Iraq. Mr. Zwitter, presenting Bush Declares "Mission Accomplished" in 2006 House, Senate Midterm Elections, effectively demonstrates that repeats in history keep skipping back to the loo if one doesn't know the record.

Free-for-All

In the vaunted Free-for-All, Mr. Zwitter shows his stance is one of positive neutrality in Top GOP Losers Reconsider Suicide PAC posted at Avant News. It's here where you'll find the fratricidal fantasies of the right-wing along with those that encourage it. Maybe we can ship the deadbeats COD to Amsterdam since the U.S. doesn't have any more cash at hand.

Speaking of cash and considering those who are olecranonly challenged, how about $25,000 for a hip replacement in the U.S? But if you take Borat's advice and go to Kazakhstan, it'll only cost $10,000 according to Aleksandr Kavokin, MD, PhD who presents Hip fractures posted at RDoctor Medical Portal, saying, "about hip fractures and prevention".

Dr. Kavokin asks those worried about osteoporosis: "Do you get enough calcium?" Being physiatrically inclined, my question would be: Do you perform any weight-bearing exercises to convert all that calcium intake into bone? If not, how much does it cost to perform the lithotripsy or kidney replacement?

Thanks to all for participating in Act III of Cir. de Cri. See everyone in Act IV.


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Sunday, October 29, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique - Act I

Lights. Ballast. Action! The curtain rises on another act of Cirque de Critique. Cir de Cri is the big tent that takes all sides as long as those taken take-on others that try to take them!

You can enter your posts in future editions of Cir de Cri or request to be a host and really get linked up by clicking right here -

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

So, enough of the barker bit. First, The Hippo, who was suppose to host Act I, was shot by a poacher last week and is slow to recuperate. Sincere appreciations must go to Robert Mugabe for The Hippo's downfall.

Cir de Cri has three classifications for posts -- one for each ring:

All-for-Free

It looks like a real donniebrook is forming over the River Ribble. The questions facing Ribblers is one of high and low tide -- plus the impact of man's recreational needs versus survival needs of other species in the watershed. So, belly up at the pub with Riversider who presents Riverworks - Pub Debate Primer posted at Save The Ribble!, saying, "The 'Save The Ribble' campaign have put together this 'pub debate primer' to arm pro-river Ribble activists with well-informed ripostes to every anti-river argument - we can venture into any pub in Lancashire, ready to answer the acolytes of the Riverworks 'Cult of Concrete'." Abe wishes to share a few pints with Riversider.

There may be some argument with Abe over our next entrant's post that discounts a report out of China claiming women are grumpier in the morning than men. All are invited to delve into this mystery with Hueina Su at Echoes of Cold Moon where she posts Miss Morning Grumpiness, saying, "It's official: recent study proved that women are grumpier than men in the morning! Beware Miss Morning Grumpiness!!!" Hueina: Abe Linkum thanks you for your bright outlook!

For-All-Free

Abe is extremely impressed that John at Hell's Handmaiden is able to receive any sort of cogent reasoning from blogs that are for Bush given this point in the election cycle. But John did -- and from a fairly prominent blogger at that!. John receives some simplistic arguments from Mark Noonan and gives it back to The Nooner fast and furious at hell’s handmaiden » Blog Archive » A reply to Mark Noonan, saying, "Hello. I've caught BlogsForBush's Mark Noonan's attention a time or two. This post represents one of those times." John, you have to move fast because GOP attention spans atrophy if they get close to the truth.

Free-for-All

Quantum metaphysics are in play at Wa Salaam where Abu Sahajj presents Reflection in Nature. Mr. Sahajj thinks we should look to the moon and be rested and solaced by its suppressed reflection. And that if humans would take time to reflect before acting, our rashness could be suppressed. Sounds good to Abe. However, his infinite density may proclude him from such wisdom at times.

Avant News, as presciently as ever, reports that President Clinton "is happy to inform Americans" that we can "sleep easier in our beds" in 2009 due to the fact that President Clinton Jails 938,000 Illegal Enemy Combatants. Thankfully, Abe recently switched his party affiliation to 'none' and won't be part of Clinton's future culling of those pachydermally persuaded.

As in all Cirques, the best act is saved for last and just before the fat lady. The best is what we have for you with Jon Swift. Jon shows us how low the Democrats go to retrieve more power, and rightly takes Karl Rove's advice mouthed by George Bush at Stay the Course: Another Democrat Dirty Trick, saying, "I certainly don't remember the President ever saying anything about "stay the course" being the strategy in Iraq so I suspected that this was another Democrat dirty trick." Geez Jon, I don't think George can remember, either.

Well, that concludes Act I. Its success was based on your patronage. Thanks once again. See everyone next time during Act II under Cirque de Critique's big top!


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Sunday, October 15, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique - Overturial Edition

The glockenspiel's gone dumb and the calliope has a flat. But the trombones still blow spit out their valves so its time to strike those in the pit and warm-up with Cirque de Critique's Overturial Edition!

Cir. de Cri. is the big tent - a blog carnival that takes all sides as long as those taken take-on others trying to take them. A critic's 'critics corner', so to speak. If you want to enter your critical posts for the next edition two weeks from today, then click here -

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

On cue and key of Cirque's musical pit boss, Jon Swift warms-up Cirque's Overture by entering his critique on Democratic handling of Mark Foley's e-missions to congressional page in-boxes in Foley Scandal Hurts Democrats. Jon adds that "although some in the liberal media claim that recent reports of Rep. Mark Foley's overeager mentoring of male Congressional pages will be damaging to Republicans in the November elections, I think this incident demonstrates why turning Congress over to the Democrats would be such a disaster for our country."

...and for Denny Hastert.

Mr. Swift, your post deservedly belongs in Cirque's vaunted 'free-for-all' category and is true to the spirit of Cir. de Cri.. We'll see if Zoldan, our trapeze catcher, re-stiched the safety net for the elephants.

That's all until Act I. Thanks to the readers and our entrant, Mr. Swift.


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Saturday, September 30, 2006

 

Cirque de Critique

A new blog carnival's in town and taking your posts. Cirque de Critique is a bi-weekly gathering of your critiques on positions critical of your own. This is the big tent that takes all sides as long as those taken take-on others trying to take them.

Abe Linkum's holding the inaugural edition on Oct. 15. If you wish to enter and link your critiques for the 15th, then click here -

Blog Carnival submission form - cirque de critique

Abe's also looking for hosts of Cirque de Critique. Give Abe a line if you'd like to do this. Thanks.


Archived Editions: Overture, Act I

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