Monday, March 26, 2007
'Speaking in Tongues': A Near Brain-Death Experience
Scientific inquiry is just starting to peek at what most enlightened observers have long seen in charismatic Christian sectists that perform the 'gifted' art of glossolalia, or 'speaking in tongues', in that these peculiar practitioners of palatine pummeling retard their level of brain function by burbling this babble, or glossolalia, during their communes with The Great Orator.
As ABC's Nightline recently reported, a team of University of Pennsylvania scientists with too much time on their watch have provided, through CAT-like vision, our first proof that the frontal lobes responsible for a glossolalist's past capacity to reason turns to gloppolioleo -- a new neurobiological phenomenon of regression that morphs highly differentiated neurons in higher level cerebral mechanisms toward basally-recessive, brain-stemmy globuloids that integrate input only for purposes of mass hysteria.
Sort of telencephaly turned paleocephalicy. Atavism, if you will.
Labels: Focus on the Frontal Lobe, science, science news, spooferisms, tribalism
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Pace Cracks Under Phelps' Pressure
In a mildly suprising compromise between parties, Gen. Peter Pace, Chiefest of Staff, has agreed -- in a secret, don't-ask-don't-tell signing statement of sectarian significance -- to allow the inbred, cretin offspring of Rev. Fred Phelps -- of Bloody Kansas, of course -- to immediately enroll into the first available OCS, of any service, in order to meet urgent goals of recruitment.
Labels: spooferisms
Monday, March 12, 2007
Cadets Cede Council to 'Coup for Christ' Crusaders
In a bold move by a minority group of West Point cadets eager to kiss ass of those they wish to step on while trying to climb higher to kiss at least one more -- and what was characterized as another example toward privatization of the military, with the expected blurring of public, pulpit, political and private monies as is found in most other faith-based initiatives the Bush administration promised would deliver the goods -- the West Point Chapter of Campus Crusade for Christ, an organization whose group picture dominates the extracurricular section of this year's yearbook, has taken over West Point's student council in a convert operation that commenced with the words "Code Bled".
They supposedly took their commission for this successful infiltration from somewhere within the pentacostic halls of the Pentagon. The action was trumpeted by Bush military-industrial mouthpiece and another example of public, private and pulpit funds, Salem Radio/Townhall.com, in that:
1. Public. The military provides a lot of ad revenue for Salem Radio, and Salem has to be the biggest shill for the latest weapons systems like our misdirected anti-missile system that has at best a weak performance record with results similar to the old analog days of system modelling via pen-and-ink tracings.
Ker-Pow! Blast that Bogey!
2. Private. Isn't Salem Radio Network a publicly-traded corporation that hawks its shares to individuals or groups looking to build private equity, such as tax-exempt organizations like megachurch phonies and other right-winged nuthouses that pump up the insanity.
3. Pulpit. All ye good men employed by the church -- turn your wages and tax-advantaged pension plans into shares of Salem Radio stock. Just a little sound financial advice from above if you don't want to be viewed as an unpatriotic traitor going to hell.
Sorry for getting half-tracked. The point is that we need to defiltrate these privatization movements cohabiting within our most vital public services since they've proven completely ineffective, no matter how much the underlings have prayed for their success.
Speaking of Christomatic government, did anybody see where the military is willing to pay a $2,000 per head bounty to veterans for recruiting of another's signature, and life, to the military's dotted line. Now that's moral, especially for a force that does Bush and Cheney's oil buddies' bloody business.
They supposedly took their commission for this successful infiltration from somewhere within the pentacostic halls of the Pentagon. The action was trumpeted by Bush military-industrial mouthpiece and another example of public, private and pulpit funds, Salem Radio/Townhall.com, in that:
1. Public. The military provides a lot of ad revenue for Salem Radio, and Salem has to be the biggest shill for the latest weapons systems like our misdirected anti-missile system that has at best a weak performance record with results similar to the old analog days of system modelling via pen-and-ink tracings.
Ker-Pow! Blast that Bogey!
2. Private. Isn't Salem Radio Network a publicly-traded corporation that hawks its shares to individuals or groups looking to build private equity, such as tax-exempt organizations like megachurch phonies and other right-winged nuthouses that pump up the insanity.
3. Pulpit. All ye good men employed by the church -- turn your wages and tax-advantaged pension plans into shares of Salem Radio stock. Just a little sound financial advice from above if you don't want to be viewed as an unpatriotic traitor going to hell.
Sorry for getting half-tracked. The point is that we need to defiltrate these privatization movements cohabiting within our most vital public services since they've proven completely ineffective, no matter how much the underlings have prayed for their success.
Speaking of Christomatic government, did anybody see where the military is willing to pay a $2,000 per head bounty to veterans for recruiting of another's signature, and life, to the military's dotted line. Now that's moral, especially for a force that does Bush and Cheney's oil buddies' bloody business.
Labels: Salem Radio, spooferisms, U.S. Military, war propaganda
Friday, March 09, 2007
Rove Strikes New "Legacy Template" for Bush Two-bit Token
via Salon.com
To commemorate the attempted inflation of George Bush's legacy along with the diminished value of American 'currency' -- in all aspects, around and through the world -- Karl Rove, through a secret signing statement, has contracted a private Ohio coin dealer to take over portions of U.S. minting operations so that a special two-bit, "precious alloy token" can be circulated within limited spheres of vanishing legates now residing somewhere in a backwater around the North and South Carolinian border. Confeds in arms forever.
Upon this trial run of what some numismatically-keen political experts perceive as the same highly corrosive run of limited denomination coinage typically pressed by The White House, it was suggested by Rove that "In God We Trust" be double-struck circumferentially on the tokens' edges to make certain to the remaining faithful that a clear vision to Bush's future is in the offering.
To commemorate the attempted inflation of George Bush's legacy along with the diminished value of American 'currency' -- in all aspects, around and through the world -- Karl Rove, through a secret signing statement, has contracted a private Ohio coin dealer to take over portions of U.S. minting operations so that a special two-bit, "precious alloy token" can be circulated within limited spheres of vanishing legates now residing somewhere in a backwater around the North and South Carolinian border. Confeds in arms forever.
Upon this trial run of what some numismatically-keen political experts perceive as the same highly corrosive run of limited denomination coinage typically pressed by The White House, it was suggested by Rove that "In God We Trust" be double-struck circumferentially on the tokens' edges to make certain to the remaining faithful that a clear vision to Bush's future is in the offering.
Labels: Bush, numismatics, spooferisms
Thursday, March 08, 2007
National Concern Over Cheney's Constipation
Suffering a similar stasis as the bog of Baghdad he helped create, and proudly exhibiting what has at all times been the stomach for more war, Vice President Dick Cheney's non-Walter Reed physicians have thoroughly screened the sixty-six year-old lumpkin and gave a diagnosis of chronic constipation due to increased D.C. and Afghani bunkerage -- plus long, numerous transatlantic crossings to kiss emirate ass in vain efforts to soften up their own gilded stools. An ancillary complication stemming from his peculiar 'activities' has been DVT, or deep vein thrombosis, not the DT's as may be expected.
Cheney's newest maladies have those bunkered closest to him, and a few other dead-ending loiterers, asking what will be the global impact from Cheney's impaction -- and who's to mop up the mess afterwards?
Labels: Dick Cheney, Health and Wellness, spooferisms
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Halliburton Scrubbed as Walter Reed Operations Chief
Due to a regaining of the majority by those opposed to our malkinetic, paraguerric President -- allowing citizens a long-waited-for, somewhat clearer overview of the inherent grossness and arrogant ineptitude of The Shrubber and his general Republicans led by the nose -- Halliburton will no longer be considered the front-runner by the GOP to take over operations privately at Walter Reed Army Medical Center, finally breaking tradition of providing the most of the crappiest.
... and the move goes far in alleviating the present 'staphing' problem. That's right, kick the scum out!
(I started this as a spoof. Maybe I'll start writing non-fiction.)
... and the move goes far in alleviating the present 'staphing' problem. That's right, kick the scum out!
(I started this as a spoof. Maybe I'll start writing non-fiction.)
Labels: spooferisms, tarnished brass, U.S. Military
